A real gentleman should use his brain and words to diffuse a potentially dangerous situation. You must also prepare to use force if necessary. The ancient Chinese proverb goes, “better to be a warrior in a garden, then a gardener in a war.” Let’s explore basic self-defense for the modern gentleman, and how you can prepare for the worst scenarios.
- Avoid confrontation at all costs
- Learn and practice some kind of fighting skill
- Stay in shape
- Get personal protection, learn how to use it, and make sure you get the right accessories (check out Battle Hawk Armory for a wide variety of options)
Avoid confrontation at all costs
The best fight is the one that never happens. Even if you’re an MMA fighter or professional kick boxer, you still want to avoid physical confrontation.
Even if you “win” a fight, you risk getting in serious trouble (even for self-defense). The charges can range up to manslaughter if someone ends up dying from injuries incurred in a fight. This risk is totally not worth it unless your own life is in danger and you’re acting purely in self-defense or protecting loved ones.
The best way to avoid fights is to follow the following common sense rules:
- Don’t get drunk and provoke people (obviously). If you’re with a friend who looks for trouble in this way, avoid hanging out with them (they probably have some problems they need to figure out in their own lives).
- Don’t hang out in dangerous areas of town or certain bars/clubs late at night, where you know people are getting in fights or robbed. Especially alone. This can even happen at sporting events. Always know your environment and be aware of your surroundings. Leave the area if you get a bad feeling.
- If someone starts talking trash to you or provoking you, apologize, deescalate the situation, and walk away. Not easy to do, but not worth the trouble to engage with someone.
- Don’t wear overly expensive clothing/jewelry in dangerous places or parts of town. Sometimes it’s better not to flex.
- If you’re taking your girl out, go to more upscale spots. Dirty clubs or bars with angry dudes might provoke someone to hit on your girl. Nothing is more dangerous than groups of guys who can’t get laid. Best to avoid this situation altogether.
- Don’t be afraid to literally run away from a dangerous situation.
- If someone sticks you up with a weapon, give them what they want. It’s not worth risking your life for something material.
Learn and practice some kind of fighting skill
Now that we’ve thoroughly discussed how to avoid a fight, sometimes physical confrontation is not avoidable. If you’ve done everything you can from the list above, but the situation has escalated, it’s always good to know that you can protect yourself and your loved ones.
For street fighting situations, the best forms of martial arts to practice are MMA, boxing, Krav Maga, wrestling, Brazilian jiu-jitsu, or Muay Thai. MMA covers a few of these technically, but it’s fine to specialize in any of these. They offer more practical benefits for a street fight situation. Any discipline teaching striking is probably good to prioritize for a beginner, since most street situations are best resolved by a few good hits (best to avoid grappling unless necessary, you never know who has a knife).
You can likely find a gym teaching these practices in your area. Practicing regularly is great for confidence in a self-defense situation. If you train regularly, you’ll be able to keep your head in real fight, which is the most important thing.
A nice side benefit – martial arts are one of the best ways to get and stay in shape. You can also build personal confidence and have more of an appreciation for violence, which will help you avoid dangerous situations.
Stay in shape
Sometimes looking like someone people don’t want to mess with can help you avoid a fight. This is basic animal psychology. We don’t want to fight something that looks bigger and stronger than us.
On the other end of the spectrum, people look to pick fights with those who are weaker. Get as strong as you can so you’re not an easy target.
Also, if you do get in a fight, obviously increased strength and stamina will give you an advantage. Fighting is probably the most tiring activity (just look at the end of any professional fight). Don’t neglect your cardio.
And speaking of cardio, if you do have to run, it’s best to be faster and in better shape than your attackers. Make sure you can at least run a mile without keeling over.
Get personal protection
As a total last resort, you may need to engage with someone breaking and entering your home. Or you might need personal protection if you have to go into a dangerous place or situation that you cannot avoid.
Get a home alarm system. Amazon has a few good options that you can install yourself. I personally use the Ring brand and can attest to how easy and effective it is.
A can of mace and a taser gun may be sufficient for any situation. In extreme cases or for home self-defense, you may need a firearm. Obviously take your own personal beliefs and comfort level with such weapons into account (we are not recommending the purchase or use of a firearm), and ALWAYS practice safe storage, maintenance, and usage of any weapon.
If you do feel like it’s the right decision to own a firearm, make sure you train to effectively use it. It’s no good to have a weapon if you don’t know how to use it in a stressful situation. A good alarm system and/or guard dog will help alert you so you can actually have your self-defense mechanism in place and you’re not panicking too much during a scary situation. You should also prepare a plan of action in case of an intruder.
These principles provide the foundation for basic self-defense for the modern gentleman. Avoid trouble when you can, but it’s best to be prepared for the absolute worst.
